Tuesday, December 12, 2006

Apparently there is a lot on my mind

I think I must be letting off some steam after taking my last final? PHEW! So the latest thought I had was myself at a grocery store. I just read a HILARIOUS blog about a lady (think we'll be friends) at the grocery store with two children...oh my goodness, I actually laughed out loud! SO FUNNY and so familiar!!

So my story normally goes something like this...(all in quotes..)"Tyler, please get the babies undone. BUT MOM, WHY DO I ALWAYS HAVE TO DO THIS? Tyler, you are the older sister and I am trying to get the stroller out, Parker, why don't you help her, you get one baby and she can get the other? NO, I DON"T WANT TO DO THAT, I"VE GOT TO CARRY MY LEAPSTER! Parker, we are not taking our leapster into the grocery store, it is hard enough to keep track of all four of you! BUT MOM, CAN I TAKE THIS INSTEAD (stuffed dog). Yes Parker you can take the dog but you will be responsible for carrying it. I will not carry it. YES MA'AM. Landen, do you want front or back? FRA. Ok, front it is. Evyn, come here, get off the seat, DO NOT GO IN THE BACKSEAT YOUNG LADY...Do you want a spanking? NO. Then come here. let me buckle you in. NO, NO, NO. Yes Evyn you HAVE to be buckled in, do you want someone to steal you away from mommy? Ok then..."

And we are off...officially leaving the van to head into the store. WE HAVEN"T EVEN MADE IT INTO THE STORE!

"Tyler, do you want to push the stroller or the cart? THE CART. Okay, grab a cart and we can get moving. Parker, stay by me. Parker, stay by me, PARKER, GET OVER HERE...I said stay by me. Ok...we've got a list a mile long. Lets get started. MOM, CAN WE GET THE CARS BANDAIDS? Not today, it's not on the list and we don't need bandaids. BUT MOM, I DON"T HAVE ANY BANDAIDS IN MY CONTAINER...I NEED BANDAIDS...Not today, we can't get them today. BUT MOM. All right, that is 10 cents from your allowance for whining (this is pre-supernanny idea). NO, NO, NO, NO! That's 20 cents. I'M DONE. Good. Lets keep going. Soap, Daddy needs soap lets grab that. Landen, DON'T TOUCH the things on the shelf. "

Off to Groceries..."MOM, WE NEED MILK. I know Tyler, its on the list and I am getting it. MOM, WE NEED YOGURT. I know Parker. It's on the list. I am getting it. MOM, CAN WE GET _______ (interject anything you can think of I wouldn't have on the list). No, we will not be getting any junk food today, you know we are not snacking on anything unhealthy. BUT MOM. Please don't but mom me...I am not in the mood. Moving on guys."

We really do get through the grocery store, really! It's not horrible...truly, it is entertaining to look back on! :) The kicker is the next part of the story...

"they are so cute, are they all yours? YES, THEY ARE ALL MINE...WE TRIED FOR THREE AND GOT TWINS ON THE LAST ROUND. (REPEAT THIS CONVERSATION AT LEAST FOUR MORE TIMES MINIMUM). Twins, you are kidding. NOPE, NOT KIDDING...THEY ARE REALLY TWINS...NO, I DO NOT RUN A DAYCARE and NO, SCHOOL DID NOT GET OUT EARLY TODAY. NO, WE DIDN"T TAKE ANY FERTILITY DRUGS and NO, I DO NOT NEED ANYONE TO BLESS MY HEART. I am a mom that is just like anyone else's mom. Read other blogs, EVERYONE who is a mother knows you do what you have to do. I now know I could do this with more children. I really could...WON'T...but could. I truly enjoy having my children. They are beautiful...for the most part, KIND...loving children. I am thrilled to be their mom. I don't want anyone to feel sorry for me and I don't want anyone to think I am a super mom...I am not a supermom...I am simply a mom of four children who is surviving the best way she knows how.

Oh, and while we are on the subject of people that drive you nuts in public...listen to this one...

Boy Baby PITCHING A FIT in the middle of a Sam's Club in Missouri. I am watching from about 4 feet away, playing the "FINE, PITCH YOUR FIT BUT I'M NOT WATCHING" while watching routine...this lady walks by and says "poor baby...I have some gum, do you want to try that....?" YES LADY, LET ME GIVE MY SCREAMING CHILD A PIECE OF GUM SO HE CAN STOP CRYING AND THEN THE NEXT TIME HE DOESN'T GET HIS WAY, I WILL JUST BRIBE HIM INTO IT BECAUSE NOW HE KNOWS IF HE PITCHES A BIG ENOUGH FIT, HE WILL BE REWARDED WITH SOME FORM OF SWEET. WOW, its a wonder these people had children that are not still living at home? (did I say that out loud?).

Ok...I think I am ready to go to bed now. But to be honest, THOROUGHLY ENJOYING THIS BLOGGING THING...GETS MY THOUGHTS OUT OF MY HEAD!

1 comment:

the_a_team said...

LOL!! That's pretty close to our conversations while trying to get into the store! Kids are such a blessing! They teach you love AND patience!!